Tools for Writing 2: Autocrit for cleaner copy

Junk words, weak verbs, and flabby constructions stand out when you use Autocrit. The end result – if used judiciously -- is enhanced prose. It also is helping me to break some bad habits.

What it does. Autocrit is an editing tool. It scans your copy for passive voice, forms of the verb “to be” (is/was), and the present participle (-ing). Is scours your prose for bland verbs (look, feel, see, know, hear, smell, taste, notice, and more) and junk words like that, adverbs, and maybe.  And Autocrit also highlights initial conjunctions (which I overdo) and “it” (which is often ambiguous).

Autocrit does not check your spelling or grammar (though it can make problems more visible). Use other programs to handle these.

This program, which works online as a service doesn’t promise perfect copy, and it doesn’t always get it right. I recently analyzed a complete novel, and I found, taken literally, it would have made it more impersonal and done serious damage to dialogue.

On the other hand, it virtually wiped out clichés, duplicated phrases and curious repetitions of words. It forced me to re-imagine and rewrite scenes. The process removed hundreds of words even though I found myself adding paragraphs.

Rewriting is my least favorite part of the process of creating a novel. Part of the problem for me is seeing my mistakes and weaknesses – especially after having gone through the work so many times I nearly have it memorized.

Raising questions. If red marks give you the heebie jeebies, this program might not be for you. Your pages will come back drenched in blood.  A 1730-word “finished” chapter showed up with 134 highlighted words and the recommendation that I remove 63 instances of these “overused” words. If pinpointed eight clichés. The program underlined every homonym (the bugbears of spelling programs) and called out dozens of cases of repeated phrases. I also got readability reports, with difficult words and complex sentences marked for my review. (This is an essential part of the report for me since this work is intended for middle grade readers.)

These reports do not change your copy. Each edit mark is something you need to respond to. It doesn’t give answers; it raises questions. I took every mark seriously, but I ignored most of them.

What’s missing. I have a version that allows me to download reports, but I found, instead, I switched back and forth between my manuscript and the online reports (which are tabbed). In theory, I’d like to go from instance to instance, with suggestions for change. That works well for spelling/grammar checks. In practice, with so many words questioned, it is probably more efficient for me to be popping back and forth.

Also, a lot of junk words that make my work more tentative (almost, a bit, nearly, somewhat) are not caught by Autocrit. And it fails to highlight similes (he was like a lion), which often are cowardly versions of metaphors (he was a lion).

Autocrit offers limited free use, so you can try it out yourself. I have a “Professional” membership, which requires an annual subscription. (I bought a lesser subscription and upgraded.)

Autocrit adds speed and efficiency. It has also made me more sensitive to chronic weaknesses. (This could be a problem for people who have a hard time turning off the internal editor. On the other hand, some may find that they compose more easily knowing so many problems will be caught. This program has become a permanent part of my rewriting process.

Every Other Friday -- Joy Smith

Joy Smith turned from a successful career in non-fiction to the challenge of writing women’s fiction and found she loved weaving plots around interesting characters. Her romantic suspense, GREEN FIRE, is her debut book. She has several other romance-based manuscripts in the works, plus a non-fiction book on boating. 

An avid sailor, she spent the past thirty years cruising the Atlantic Ocean and the Caribbean Sea with “Captain My Way.” Her published works include two books on managing a sailboat, a cookbook, and a book about wedding planning for moms. Joy and her handsome captain live in Connecticut and sail out of Mystic. During her spare time she continues to develop recipes to pass on, crochets prayer shawls, spoils their seven darling grandchildren, and tries not to eat too much ice-cream.

Find her on the Web at  www.joysmith.net (which promotes all her books)and www.joysmithromance.com (which is dedicated to GREEN FIRE), or on Twitter. 


-->

Tell me about GREEN FIRE.

Happy to, Peter. It’s a just-released romantic suspense, currently available as a digital book. It is said in Colombia that miners addicted to finding emeralds have “green fire in their bellies.” In my story, Victor Novak, a handsome devil who works as a companion to lonely, wealthy matrons (read, gigolo), responds to an invite to Bogota from his new-found brother, a corrupt security guard at an emerald mine, in hopes of bettering himself with a career in emeralds. There, he becomes involved in his brother’s web of danger and deceit, while falling in love with the honest and beautiful Marisol, a single mother struggling to save her family’s flower plantation from the man she believes murdered her father. The story comes to a head when Victor has to choose between becoming a rich (but lonely) criminal or having the love and family he never thought he deserved.

What drove you to write GREEN FIRE?

My love for emeralds of course. What woman doesn’t like jewelry? When researching crime in Colombia for another story, I happened across emerald mining and was fascinated. Online, I found an article about cocaine being smuggled out of the country in flower crates—which led me to craft a plot using emeralds, instead.

Who did you write the book for?

I wanted my story to appeal to men as well as women readers. While a romantic theme runs through the book, I’ve included lots of action scenes as Victor defends himself, his brother, and his woman against cartel gunslingers. When my worst critic--my husband and avid reader of thrillers and “war books”--read my manuscript and liked it, I felt I may have met my goal.

What were your biggest obstacles?

Dealing with Spanish--silly me, I studied French in school. Who knew it would become a second language in the U.S? Also, I worried about adding realism to the setting. I’d never been to Bogota, so I purchased a video of Colombia and then relied on a combo of online Web info and my experiences in other Caribbean countries, like Puerto Rico, to portray what I hope is a fairly accurate rendering of the environment. 

What are your productivity tips?

Stay away from Facebook/Twitter and relegate computer games to down time in front of a bad TV show.

Do you have any questions for me?

Yes, Peter. You seem to be very organized and focused in your writing. How do you manage not to get sidetracked (like me)?

Probably the most important thing I do is decide the day before what I will write. This is a promise I keep to myself. That doesn't mean life doesn't get in the way or that I will ignore a fresh idea. If I have other demands, I carve out 15 minutes to keep my promise. If I get a new idea, I STILL write what I committed to write--even though that means more time at the keyboard. By keeping my promise each day, I know I will continue to make progress on my primary effort.

Bigger 15–Story bites reader

It was the best of stories. It was the worst of stories. Or, dank chill basements, rich coffee, the grind of the carriages wooden wheels.

I love 18th century literature. It gives you an unmistakable point of view and rich, sensual imagery that puts you right in the story. Unfortunately, many people will not give a tale a chance if it starts slowly if the vocabulary demands a dictionary.

We live in the age of the ADD reader. They know new experience is always a click away.

So, I had mixed feelings as I read a contest entry recently that evoked the age of Jane Austen, Charles Dickens, and Edgar Allan Poe. Close to half of what I read is from that era, but I know I am not the typical reader. The careful development of setting and character in the contest entry delighted me, but I knew that this story would not be a winner. The other contest judges made sure of this, and their comments railed against the slow pacing and lack of conflict.

The score I gave was more encouraging, but the other judges may have been more helpful. Anyone seeking to have their fiction (or nonfiction, for that matter) published should take a close look at how well they are engaging readers. This has long been true for short story writers, but today -- especially in popular genres -- novels require hooks, too.

There are many ways to create hooks. The title itself is an essential hook that immediately cues the audience to genre and assures them that the writer takes the work seriously. Misleading or boring titles give editors and agents a reason to pass on work. And, if they survive the editorial process, they reduce the chances of even a wonderful work reaching its potential.

Once the first hurdle of the title is cleared, the first few sentences of text must be negotiated. Amateur writers, if they consider a hook at all, are likely to begin with action. This is a good instinct—strong verbs make for powerful writing and action can create vivid images. The biggest problem they have is a tendency to begin with chase scenes, fights, and characters hanging on to ledges 47 stories up. After they finish those first pages of danger and jeopardy, everything else that follows can be a letdown. In addition, there is no complication to the excitement. We don't know the character yet, so how can we care?

Action that is unusual is a surer bet. The chemist preparing a sample that might prove his brother did not poison the investor. The hacker searching for the malware that could destroy a civil rights lawyer. The young woman macgyvering kitchen appliances and utensils to prepare a defense against the zombie apocalypse.

All of these actions have the potential to provide interesting details. They happen at times when the characters aren't running for their lives and so reflection (that reveals character) is reasonable. And each of these has stakes. The stakes can be raised even further if the protagonist faces a dilemma. For instance, if the chemist has a choice between implicating his brother and sending him to the gallows, or not doing the test and allowing the blame to fall upon himself. This makes it tough on our hero and delightfully agonizing for readers.

An action beginning can also raise a story question. Readers will happily work their way through hundreds or even thousands of pages to get a satisfying answer. Will Scarlett saved Tara? Will Dorothy find her way home? Well Robin Hood avoid capture? I’ll note that there may be other questions along the way. Dorothy's assassination of the Wicked Witch of the West is an urgent question for much of The Wizard of Oz. But raising questions is good, even if they are not “story” questions. And questions need not be raised by actions.

One powerful beginning to a story is one that presents a point of view, often a first person narration, that raises the question, “who is this guy?” In science fiction, an unusual setting—two moons rising in the night sky–can introduce questions and capture interest.

No matter which hooks a writer chooses to use, the beginning needs to be clear and succinct. An unclear beginning will stop a reader cold. In most cases, it breaks the contract between the writer and the reader. How can you be trusted to tell the story and provide a good experience if you begin with confusion? And, just as jokes are funnier when they have fewer words, hooks are more effective when all the excess verbiage is cleared away. Be brief and simple. Avoid compound, convoluted sentences and big words (at least at the beginning).

There was a time when I finish every book I started. But too many novels have taken me to unsatisfying destinations. Today, I only finish about three quarters of the novels I start. (I follow a rule my wife taught me—read 100 pages minus your age, and then decide to put the book down or read to the end.) Of course, this is for books that I've purchased. I read the first few pages of many more books and most of those don’t end up in my shopping cart. (Of course, there are those peculiar people who turn to the last pages. For those, you want to create Endings That Buzz).

Writers, you are facing writers who are likely to be less tolerant than I am, so hook them and hold them.  

Every Other Friday -- Dani Collins

Please welcome romance writer Dani Collins. In 2012, Dani signed contracts for six books and put out her own indie title while holding down a day job and running kids to school, sports, and jobs. She’s pretty good at writing fast and is currently teaching herself to blog fast—including tagging a witty bio onto the end of her posts.

Readers are invited to check out her website. She also can be found on Twitter and Facebook.

Tell me about THE HEALER.

Hi Peter.  Thanks for having me on your blog.

Vaun is a Kerf General patrolling lands that belong to his people by treaty. Things are already going wrong when he intervenes with enemy traders to free a slave he thinks is Kerf, like him. She’s not. Athadia belongs to the mythical Alvian race of healers that his people fear. The first time they touch, she knows he’s one, too.

The Healer was supposed to be a historical romance—someone recently called it a cross between Highlanders and Vikings, which is how it turned out once I realized it needed its own world. This was a bigger challenge to me than researching real places and events. I’m a busy working mom who writes in that hilarious concept called ‘free time.’

What drove you to write THE HEALER? Who did you write it for?

Being time-challenged, I gravitate to quick reads and therefore mostly write shorter novels like my Harlequin Presents. But I knew this story needed a lot more space for developing all the layers that I wanted to put into it.

Sometimes, as a reader (and a writer), you want a story you can dig into and stay with for days (months/years). I wrote The Healer for that story lover.

What were your biggest obstacles?

Time is always an issue for me and when I began this story, my kids were still little. I wrote the first couple of chapters in a notebook before bed. A few years later, I decided to finish it for Nanowrimo, one of the best exercises in writer productivity there is. 

(If you haven’t heard of National Novel Writing Month, it’s an informal challenge you set for yourself in the month of November to complete about fifty thousand pages.)

[Editor's note - This blog has a series on NaNoWriMo.]

What are your productivity tips?

Nowadays I love working off a synopsis, but didn’t have one for The Healer. Instead I

warmed up for Nano by doing the 30 Days of World Building exercises by Stephanie Bryant. Even if you don’t like preplanning, you might enjoy this. It’s more about finding the possibilities in your story than locking yourself in. I really enjoyed it.

Other tips for the time-crunched:

• Write before work if you have a day job. Yes, that means getting up at 5 am. It’s gross, I won’t kid you. (Ignore if you are a night person. I so am not.)
•  Quit TV (mostly). I pick one or two shows as must haves. I currently excuse myself from writing for The Big Bang Theory and will drop everything when Mad Men starts up again, including laundry and cooking.
• Actually, never bother with laundry and cooking. (Says the woman with teenagers and an understanding husband.)
• Get a job writing to deadline. Mine was the local paper. I did it for 8-9 months and I learned to write fast and clean, ‘cause I got paid a flat rate of $25. The longer I took, the lower my wage.
• Self-doubt can really slow you down. Do some exercises in developing your voice so you feel confident about the words you’ve chosen. Getting the Words Right: How to Rewrite, Edit and Revise  is a great resource for developing your personal writing style.

Question for Peter:

How do you balance the desire to write fast with the revision process, so you’re not creating a lengthy clean up once the first draft is done?

I work hard to keep the drafting and revising processes separate. One is right brain, the other left. I have found that, by generally bumping up my output, I have developed a lot of instincts that keep me from missteps during the composing process. In addition, I have developed some approaches that help pantsers add just enough structure to avoid pitfalls.

Writing Bigger 14: Breaking the Chains

We all love dramatic, emotional stories with outsized characters and unexpected turns. These Bigger Stories capture our imagination and grow in the retelling. Picking these out of real life often comes naturally, but creating them requires boldness, courage, determination, and skill.

In fact, writers seem to dodge the biggest stories, avoiding worst cases for protagonists, limiting the stakes, and avoiding conflict. I saw this over and over again as I scored fiction contest entries recently. Stories with real potential were tentative and did not fulfill their promise. Many writers are held back by chains they've forged themselves. Let's explore four:

1. Believability  -- The most common sin I've seen in unpublished manuscripts is starting in the wrong place. Writers are obsessed with telling us "what we need to know" before they get into the story. Characters explain the past to each other. Big blocks of narration build worlds or explain rules. Some of this is throat clearing (the writer figuring things out) or conflict avoidance (see below), but a lot is there to build a case for what follows. But readers are willfully suspending disbelief. They will accept a lot -- if you tell a good story. Slow beginnings drag down a story. They reveal a lack of confidence in the writer.

I think part of the problem comes from teachers, critics, and writing group members who confuse debate style arguments with story logic. Storytellers need verisimilitude, not proofs. (Think of the  core concepts and the twists and turns of your favorite stories. Do you accept them because of facts or feelings?) If you, as a writer, believe it, others will, too. Facts and back story don't build a case, they create a clear context.

2. Conflict avoidance -- Norman Mailer was a pugnacious writer, but he's more the exception than the rule. Because they are practiced at seeing other points of view and skilled in articulating perspectives (including those they disagree with), writers are often peacemakers. They smooth over misstatements and faux pas and help people explore compromises. This is admirable in real life, but it can really wreck a story. Every scene should have a conflict. And it is best if it ends in the worst possible way. But I read story after story where a good conflict arises and the characters smooth it out. They part friends. Hmm.
 
3. Kindness -- You've gotta be cruel to be kind. Lessons come hard. The best characters only learn them when they get knocked around. They pay a price. Readers won't hate you if you're mean to your characters, they'll love you. Stop worrying about your characters (or what your readers will think of you) and get out your torture kit. You can’t remain removed and dignified and ace it." The bigger your ambition, the bigger the situation, and (mostly) the bigger the emotion, the more likely it is that you risk looking ridiculous. If you protect your dignity (and your heart), you are unlikely to move me.
 
4. Dignity -- In Susan Shapiro's article, "Make Me Worry You're Not Okay," she talks about how she has made the humiliation essay her signature assignment. "It encourages students to shed vanity and pretension and relive an embarrassing moment that makes them look silly, fearful, fragile, or naked.

We want to be trusted, kind, dignified peacemakers. What wrong with that? Nothing in real life. But in fiction, it's dull. It makes things too easy for your characters (and for you, as a writer). It chains stories to the mundane when they were meant to soar.

Want more? I've added upcoming talks and courses to my Web site.

Every Other Friday - Tawny Weber

Tawny Weber has been writing sassy, sexy romances since her first Harlequin Blaze hit the shelves in 2007. A fan of Johnny Depp, cupcakes and color coordination, she spends a lot of her time shopping for cute shoes, scrapbooking and hanging out on Facebook.

Readers can check out Tawny’s books at her website.

Tell me about A SEAL’S SURRENDER.
A SEAL’s Surrender is a light, sexy contemporary romance about a guy who is used to life going the way he wants it, and suddenly finds himself out of his element when he’s seduced by the sweet girl next door.  This is a follow up to my best-selling release, A SEAL’s SEDUCTION.  Both stories feature Navy SEALs who are at a career crossroads, questioning their once unshakeable devotion to their service after the death of a friend. 

What were your biggest obstacles?
My biggest obstacles in writing tend to be the same, regardless of which book I’m working on. I have a habit of overcommitting my time, then trying to frantically juggle everything at once. Contracted deadlines, working on a planned indie release, promotion and marketing, judging contests, and keeping up with my critique commitments can get overwhelming sometimes. On top of that, we’re a homeschool family, which means that’s the first priority on every weekday’s schedule, and I have to fit everything else in around it.

What are your productivity tips?
The best productivity and writing tip I can offer is to know your process. What time of day do you write best? (I write best at night). What do you need in order to start your story? (I need to know my characters, their inner conflict, the external conflict and the dark moment). How fast do you realistically write? A goal to hit 10 pages a day is admirable, but, if you average 5, that’s only going to be a source of frustration. Do you write slower in the beginning of the story, then pick up steam as you hit the middle? Or is the middle the most difficult? Are you a first draft writer or a layering writer? A plotter or a pantser? All of these combine to create a unique, individual writing process. And while I think our processes might shift a little from book to book, they generally follow the same path. 

So once you know your process, you can work it. You can be realistic about your expectations and honest with yourself about whether you’re reaching your full writing productivity potential or slacking off.

About A SEAL'S SURRENDER...

Subject: Lieutenant Commander Cade Sullivan
Status: On leave
Mission: He’s home to take care of some family business.
Obstacle: Eden Gillespie. The girl who always lands in trouble...has landed in his bed!

Lieutenant Commander Cade Sullivan is the job. His commitment to the Navy SEALs is absolute—almost. Worse still, he’s been summoned home, where his family is the town royalty and women vie to be one of Cade’s conquests. One of them in particular....

Ever since they were kids, Cade has been rescuing Eden Gillespie. Now she’s decided she owes him one heck of a thank-you—one that involves a bed, naked bodies and sweet satisfaction. But when their sexy trysts are discovered, Eden becomes a bit of a town sensation—and not in a good way. Can she convince her SEAL to risk one last rescue operation?
 
Uniformly Hot! The Few. The Proud. The Sexy as Hell.

Draft 9 - Let's Get Physical

Good writing habits can become boring. What? Should I sit down at my Mac, open up Word, and set the timer for the hundredth time in a row and feel good about it? There is a (crushed) rebel within me. Longing for novelty. Longing for change. And this rebel needs a little bit of freedom from time to time.

So I give myself permission to take a different approach, and that usually means adding a physical dimension.

Stand up. Sometimes it's as simple as getting out of my chair, placing my laptop on a high shelf, and slipping into my routine. Not sitting. This is a good thing.

Pace. Especially for dialogue, I find it can help if I stand up, pace until I mumble a few lines to myself, capture them and repeat. Pages come out in a way that is anything but routine.

Use a pencil. I started my career as a writer by first writing in longhand, and that tactile experience still feels good to me. And it is different. Words fill pages and strike outs, insertions, and edits are all available, present, and obvious. The tone and the voice alter slightly. The experience is renewed.

Dictate. The best gift I gave myself when I first became a full-time, independent write was a dictation program. It took me a couple of weeks to get used to the process, but now I do half my drafting through dictation. It is more productive and has extended the time between "this is too familiar" days.

Find a new place to write. Laptops and wireless have unchained me. I'm apt to write in several places in my house (and on my porch when the weather is good). And, because I am not easily distracted, I've also found it refreshing to write at the library, in hotels, in cafes, and in airports. It is especially valuable for me to "take it on the road" when I am working on screenplays. The locations remind me to open up the scenes and make them visually interesting.

Note: Adding a physical dimension to your writing is not the same as gardening or going for a walk to let ideas stew in the back of your mind. I am a big believer in that  sort of stepping away from writing as part of the overall process. But here I'm talking about is shaking up how you work as you put words on paper. So, the result of your experiment should be words on paper in real time, not later.

Skipping your writing time and missing your goals happens from time to time, but that is not a good thing. And your shake up shouldn't be faux writing, like cutting and pasting text or pictures into Scrivener or doing research or interviewing your characters. All this is useful, but it is not writing.

So, when you feel hemmed in, add a physical dimension. Use an idea on this list or find your own ways to change things up (and tell me about it). I'm sure there are dozens of ways people get out of the routine without dodging writing commitments. For me, such changes are always good. They improve my attitude and freshen the work itself. So give the rebel inside a little freedom.

See also Six Posts on Fast Drafting.
Want more? I've added upcoming talks and course to my Web site.